Can Your Relationship Handle Getting a Puppy?

I said I would never do it again. Yes, I wanted a dog, but I wanted an adult dog. I'm too old to deal with a puppy, and all the things that go with it. However. When our contractor said his malamute mated with a husky and had nine puppies, my husband wanted to see them. The next day he pulled up with the mama in the back of his truck, and nine little fluff-balls with her, a couple weeks away from being ready to be weaned.

So we got a puppy. I mean. Look at this little guy.

There are plenty of books and sites that will take you through the supplies, the food, the training that you will need to know for a puppy- but they don't prepare you for the emotional toll it will take. I've raised a puppy before in my life, and I know what goes with it. In retrospect, I wish my husband and I had sat down and talked explicitly about what to expect, so that when we got frustrated, we could get some distance from the situation.

1. If you are married or in a partnership, one of you will probably do more work than the other. My husband and I split dog duties pretty evenly now, but there were specific puppy-related tasks that he was not fond of- like cleaning up poop off the floor. I did that. A puppy eats and goes outside more often than a grown dog, and I was the one who kept track of that schedule. I kept track of the vet appointments, medicines, shots, etc. He would take him to the vet, but the "mental load" was on me.

2. Research the breed. I did not know that huskies are some of the most difficult dogs to house-train. It was a full six months before he was not having accidents in the house. Most dogs are trained within weeks, and only have an occasional accident. We were cleaning up messes for MONTHS. Knowing this ahead of time wouldn't have changed my decision, but it sure would have better prepared me. (Buy Folex in bulk.) Huskies and malamutes are also stubborn, don't respond to negative training, have a strong bite (he's ruined most chew toys), and although they love people, can be aggressive with other dogs. Male malamutes also grow to be around 100 pounds: If he goes after a squirrel when we are walking, I can't stop him unless he is well-trained. Now that I understand this, it's helped me to have a better relationship with him.

3. You will get fed up and lose your temper. Having a puppy is a lot like having a baby, except it grows up in a year. The hard part goes by quickly, but puppies are full of energy, and will test your patience. Apollo was VERY "mouthy." He loved to "play bite," sometimes not knowing his strength, and being stubborn, not wanting to stop when we said no. Puppy teeth must be sharper than diamonds, because they hurt BAD. I blew my top more than once, and I am one of the most patient people in the world. You need to know this will happen and have a plan for when it does. Make a deal with your partner that when you have had enough, they will take the dog out and give you time for a bubble bath.

4. Make sure you know how much a dog will cost. We are lucky enough that we don't have a problem affording our dogs, but money can be one of the biggest stressors in a relationship, and if you are not prepared for the cost, it can be surprising. Food, toys, leash & harness, a dog gate, dog bed, dog shampoo, shots, license, etc. etc. etc. It adds up. It's worth it to create a spreadsheet to make sure you fully understand what it will cost.

5. You are going to lose some things to chewing. Put those expensive heels away and don't wear them for a while. If you are careful about what you leave out, it shouldn't be too bad, but you will inevitably lose some stuff. We lost: slippers, pillows, a futon mattress, and a few bottom sheets (digging and creating holes in them). We didn't lose anything irreplaceable- but if you have that signed home run baseball you caught sitting somewhere within reach of the dog, well- don't say I didn't warn you.

6. Be ready for 24/7 care- at least at first. As I said, it can be like having a baby. We had to sleep with Apollo tethered to one of us so that he would not wander away in the night. We had to take him out every four hours to pee. We had to keep him within eyeshot to make sure he wasn't chewing or eating something he shouldn't be. It goes by quickly, but be prepared.

Apollo these days is a big fluffy goofball that I could not picture our household without. I'm definitely glad we decided to get him. But I won't say the first year wasn't without stressors. He is still stubborn, escapes from the yard like Houdini, and likes mud, but I wouldn't trade him for anything.